This was a banner week for weird things coming from students, and not always mine.
On Tuesday, while doing his warmups, one of my 8th graders said to me “Seem like we were here just yesterday.”
The same day one of my 7th graders asked me if I listened to Swedish Death Metal. Not realizing it really existed, I pictured the Muppet’s Swedish Chef banging his head around and screaming about death.
Friday I was up observing my student teacher from last year in her classroom. The first two kids to come into her 9th grade class decided to battle-crawl their way into the classroom – laying on the floor pulling themselves across the floor on their elbows. One of them crawled past 4 rows of desks and instead of going down the aisle, he crawled under three desks before popping up in his seat.
The week’s coup-de-grace, which actually happened on Wednesday, was during my 3rd period 7th grade class.
Sometimes I chat with the kids as they do their warmups, and somehow we got onto the subject of the grossest food you’ve ever eaten. One kid told about eating a ham & cheese sandwich, with peanut butter and jelly. Right after that a kid 
raised his hand and told us “We were at this steak house and my dad ordered Rocky Mountain Oysters.”
I didn’t see that coming. But to make matters worse, a minute or two after I managed to get the subject changed, the Principal walks in and asks “So, what are you learning in Mr. Rossi’s class today?”
Several kids blurt out “Rocky Mountain Oysters!”, which in my defense I pointed out that I wasn’t the one that brought it up. Half the class pointed to the kid who did bring it up saying “Yeah, <insert student’s name here> brought it up.”
I had a small panic attack as the Principal walked out, but quickly calmed down. I’ve worked with her for 9 out of the last 12 years, have had even worse incidents and she still keeps hiring me, so I figured she would just call me into her office later and chastise me for getting off task.
I’ve talked to her several times since, and she hasn’t once brought it up. But if fully expect, during one of our in-services on the Core Standards and Common Assessments to inform the entire faculty that “even though Mr. Rossi thinks they are, Rocky Mountain Oysters are not part of the Math Core Curriculum.”
4 comments:
I don't care what anyone says, a teacher's life is filled with every kind of emotion one can muster up! What a cool world you live in Max, enjoy it all!
That's what I always say: My job is never boring. And thanks, for the most part I enjoy it thoroughly!
If three students mention 2 stories about Rocky Mountain Oysters each, and one story was just made up, how many true Rocky Mountain Oyster stories do we have?
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Yeah, most people don't have jobs wherein people battle crawl into their offices. I, of course, think this sounds perfectly normal. Just like the other day when I passed 3 kids in the hall who had tinfoil antennae on their heads and were making "plink-plink" noises as they walked along. I didn't even blink. It's junior high.
As for Swedish Death Metal, I like your version best. I had no idea the Swedes had done anything music-wise after ABBA. (and now I'm picturing the Swedish Chef with ABBA doing some head-banging.....)
And rocky mountain oysters sounds exactly like what the kids will remember most from your class. (If it had happened to me, I would've had parent calls already.)
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