Funny Facebook Finds

All I ever do on Facebook is look for these funny little graphics and then share them forward.  I rarely read, and never post, those little “Having lasagna for dinner” updates.  I’m not inclined to care what people are having for dinner, unless I’m invited to join.  And I doubt many of you want to know that I am currently microwaving some leftover pasta.

But, there are a lot of hilarious little graphics on there, so I keep going back.  Here’s a few I decided to “share” here too.

(This one’s for you Lisa)

For those of you who don’t get that last one, this should explain it:

Keepers?

It’s a beautiful day today.  Sunny and warm enough that I opened up the swamp cooler and have fresh air blowing through the house.  Warm enough that I have the top down and the doors off the Jeep.  Just about perfect.

Maybe I’ll be able to keep it like this for more than one day this time…

But this is a definite keeper – the sticker for my Jeep that my sister-in-law made for me. (Stick-it Vinyl Graphics)

Goose on the loose atop the roof.

Halfway through 1^st period one of my students points to the windows and says “There’s a goose watching us!”

Lo and behold, there it was, perched on top of the building one floor above us, and we’re already on the 3^rd floor. I got some good pictures and then went back to teaching.  By the end of 1^st period it was gone. 

Two ships passing in the night. Or one ship passing 30 others in the morning.

Talaxian Holiday

And then…

…all of a sudden you realize “It’s past 8pm, and it’s still light outside!”

Summer’s on it’s way, and all is right with the world.

Dear Westboro Baptist…

Go away.   Your pathetic attempts to get noticed, to be ‘relevant’, are getting tired.

What do we call someone who claims to be God, and in His name slaughters 21 innocent children  for the sins of people they don’t even know?*

In the words of Dana Carvey as the “Church Lady”:

“Could it be…SATAN?”

*(20 at Sandy Hook and one at the Boston Marathon, not to mention the thousands of soldiers, the 6 educators and 2 runners that Westboro Baptist claims were killed to punish the U.S. for it’s Gay Agenda)

For my e-mail users…

Ok, here’s what the problem is – my e-mail service was switched to a different server, so there is a new address for the web portal.

The old one was: https://web14.dnchosting.com:2096/

The new one is: https://web112.dnchosting.com:2096/

I fixed it so the link on this blog is now correct, but if you have it bookmarked then you will have to make sure you update your bookmark.

Sorry about the confusion, please try it and let me know if you are still having problems with it.

One just for my English teacher friends.

1. Post picture you found on Facebook,
2. sit back,
3. watch English teachers’ heads explode.

“Meet the man who cured his own colon cancer and was called ‘crazy’ by doctors.”

Maybe?

Not this again?

Here’s why this is destined to fail:

It assumes that this one day’s of oil will immediately back up all the way to the oil producing countries, causing them to panic and cut prices.

Consider this:

1. The Chevron station I worked at, one of the busiest in Utah, had gas delivered only 2 or 3 times a week.
2. They get their gas from a distributor that probably stores hundreds of thousands of gallons of gas right here in Utah.
3. Those distributors get their oil from a system that has millions, if not billions, or gallons of oil in transit at any given time.
4. The whole system is designed to absorb huge fluctuations in demand with relative ease.

Furthermore:

1. From a psychological standpoint, I can guess that at least half those participating will fill up their cars the day before, rather than risking running out of gas, putting all that extra money into the system a day early.
2. Those that fill up their vehicle the day after will only be depriving their local gas station the money for one day.  Any damage that would have done will probably be cancelled out by the huge increase they had in sales two days before.

And finally, after some research on the internet, I cropped this chart out of an article about crude oil prices in the 90’s, one that had nothing to do with this boycott.

It shows that gasoline prices did drop 30¢ a gallon right after April ‘97, but it took 2 months to do it and they rebounded to the pre-April price by December of that year.

There’s one in every crowd.

I have this sign posted in my classroom because I want my students to think ahead and not wait to the last possible moment, and then expect me to immediately correct, grade and enter scores.

And, unless you’ve been in a coma for the last decade, you should know that you need to show up at the airport at least an hour before your flight leaves.  This is a fact of life in post-9/11 air travel.

As I was getting in line to check in for my flight back from Phoenix, a man in front of me was getting quite upset because the Southwest personnel would not let him and his family cut in front of the 100 or so passengers already there because he was running late and they might miss their flight.  I might have had some sympathy for him if something unexpected had happened, like they got a flat tire on the way or were stuck in the emergency room waiting for one of his kids to get x-rayed.  But it was obvious this was simply a lack of planning when his son said “I told you there would be a line.” and “I kept telling you we should leave already.”  Lack of planning dude, should have listened to the kid.  Oh, and calling out “Hurry up” to no one in particular isn’t going to help either.

But the funniest line was from his older daughter who said “We’ll probably end up having a stop over in Salt Lake City.  We can’t stop there, we’re not Mormon.”

It’s amusing, and sad, that even after “hosting the world” here for the 2002 Olympics, there are still a whole lot of misinformed stereotypes about Utah out there.

Funny signs on the way to the Grand Canyon.

One of the things I did while I was in Phoenix was to go see the Grand Canyon.  I’d never seen it before, and figured it would be something nice to check off my non-existent bucket list.  I have to cull through the many pictures I took there before I post them, but for now I’m posting some of the funny things I saw on the way.

Yeah, I live in Bumble Bee.  That’s right next to Crown King.

Hey, my place or yours?
Where do you live?
On Bloody Basin Road.
Uh, think I’ll just go home alone.

I worked with a woman at the pizza place that used to like to call me Schneeb.  Why, I don’t know, but this sign reminded me of her.

We stopped in Flagstaff to get gas, this sign was right next door.  Seems to be some sort of paranormal/UFO convergence going on in the area.

The sign on the Men’s room door at the gas station where we filled up.  The Women’s room had the same sign, except the squirrel had make-up in her hand and the sign said “No Nuts”

Whipped cream canister in the alcohol aisle at the gas station.

Just in case you didn’t notice – it’s 36 proof whipped cream.

We drove on Route 66 through Flagstaff.

My road.

At a view point at the Grand Canyon.  Not much information here anymore.

“Pink Jeep Tours” will take you along the rim of the Grand Canyon.

65°F at 6:00 in the morning on the day I came home to…

…a forecasted high of 61°F.

Sunrise, Sunset..

The theme for this week's "Thematic Photographic" is just what the title says.

As some of you know, we are on spring break right now, and for the first time in several years, I'm actually out of town on vacation*. I came down to Phoenix to visit some friends that used to live in my neighborhood. They actually live in Chandler, which is a suburb of Phoenix, and right on the boarder of the Gila River Indian Community,which means that the only development on the other side of their property wall is the Gila River Casino. Without the city lights, you can see the stars quite well at night, and since most of the land south of them is undeveloped, there is often a nice breeze coming through their yard, and a lot of birds flying around. Yeah, they get e occasional wind storm during the monsoon season (late summer, early fall) but right now it's perfect.

Anyway, the weather here is beautiful, beginning of. ay and the afternoon highs are right around 85F. I took this picture at sunset while sitting on their back patio. I really liked the way the light was hitting the palm trees, and then realized it would be perfect for this week's theme.

 

*P.S. - I know I don't usually post when I'm on vacation, because of people who might take advantage of my house being vacant, but since I now have a roommate, those of you reading this that may be so inclined should be aware that the house is not vacant. Sorry to ruin your fun.