Foxworthy on Wisconsin.

• If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 38 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by, you might live in Wisconsin.
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• If you're proud that your region makes the national news 96 nights each year because Park Falls is the coldest spot in the nation, you might live in Wisconsin.
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• If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, you might live in Wisconsin .


• If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five months out of the year, you might live in Wisconsin


• If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there, you might live in Wisconsin .


• If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead, you might live in Wisconsin .


• If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you might live in Wisconsin.


• If you have either a pet or a child named 'Brett,' you might live in Wisconsin .


• If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you might live in Wisconsin .


• If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you might live in Wisconsin .


• If you know how to say Oconomowoc, Waukesha , Menomonie & Manitowoc, you might live in Wisconsin.


• If you think that ketchup is a little too spicy, you might live in
  Wisconsin.

YOU KNOW YOU ARE A TRUE WISCONSINITE WHEN:

• 1. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.


• 2 'Vacation' means going up north past Hwy 8 for the weekend.


• 3. You measure distance in hours.


• 4. You know several people who have hit deer more than once.


• 5. You often switch from 'heat' to 'A/C' in the same day and back again.


• 6. Your whole family wears Packer Green to church on Sunday.


• 7. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching.


• 8. You see people wearing camouflage at social events (including weddings and funerals ).


• 9. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.


• 10. You think of the major food groups as beer, fish, and venison.


• 11. You carry jumper cables in your car and your wife or girlfriend knows how to use them.


• 12. There are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at Mill's Fleet Farm at any given time


• 13. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.


• 14. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.


• 15. You refer to the Packers as 'we.'


• 16. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction.


• 17. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.


• 18. You have no problem pronouncing Lac Du Flambeau.


• 19. You consider Minneapolis exotic.


• 20. You know how to polka.


• 21. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your blue spruce.


• 22. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age.


• 23. Down South to you means Illinois .


• 24. A brat is something you eat.


• 25. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole shed.


• 26. You go out to fish fry every Friday


• 27. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.


• 28. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.


• 29. You find minus twenty degrees 'a little chilly.'


• 30. You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to all your
  Wisconsin friends.

Thank you Lisa (the sister) for that list. I was laughing my butt off. Especially the first one. I'm not a big fan of either the cold or fishing. One time on the way up to our property, passing by Strawberry Reservoir, there were a bunch of people out on the ice fishing. I look over at my brothers and say "It's cold, it's wet and it's fishing. Just my kind of sport."