Gay Marriage Legal in Utah?

[ Did you hear the sonic boom from Highland, Utah?  That was Gayle Ruzicka imploding when Mayor Ralph Becker legally married two men in Salt Lake City. ]

KSL.com reports that a Federal Judge decided that Utah’s Amendment 3, defining a marriage as between 1 man and 1 woman, is unconstitutional.

[ Do you hear the big sucking sound from Utah County?  That’s the imploded-Gayle-Ruzicka black hole sucking all of Alpine, Lehi, and American Fork into oblivion. ]

Salt Lake County District Attorney Sim Gill said that until he receives some legal injunction, the County Clerk’s office will be issuing marriage licenses to any couple that applies.

Utah Governor Gary Herbert is “…very disappointed…” and will “…determine the best course to defend traditional marriage within the borders of Utah,”

Salt Lake City Mayor Ralph Becker has already performed the marriage of Utah Democratic Party Chairman Jim Dabakis and his partner. (That’s not them down below).

There’s no doubt in my mind that the Great State of Utah will waste a ton of money fighting this.  I’ll also bet that, in light of the DOMA and Prop 8 rulings, this ruling will be upheld.

And for those of you screaming “state rights” and “will of the majority”; I can’t put it any better than utzfan did in the KSL.com comments: “the majority of the southern states still wanted slavery, luckily our federal rights prevailed!!!”

Utah Headline.

Lawmaker drafts bill to help Utahns keep and eat roadkill

Hello? Utah here.

As an 8th Grade Math teacher, I had to take a national survey today.  I got to this question and first laughed, then cried.

Could they at least acknowledge that we exist?  That having only 26 in a class is an anomaly in at least one of the 50 states?

The top one has the question and choices exactly like the real survey I took, the bottom one is the way I would imagine it if it was written just for Utah teachers.

Just click on it if it’s too small to read.

Lotta nerve banning fireworks.

I’m sure that there are people out there that are incensed that our governor banned fireworks outside of the city limits.

I’m also, sadly, sure that there are people who are going to completely ignore the danger and the ban.

I hope they can find them and make them pay for all the costs that are incurred by the fire they are going to start.

The latest article I read says we have 6 fires still burning, covering over 121,000 acres of land.  Close to, or even more than, 200 homes (and cabins) have been destroyed and I know of at least one life that has been lost.

• Clay Springs Fire – 88,000 acres
• Rosecrest Fire – 650 acres
• Lost Lake Fire
• Wood Hollow Fire – 47,295 acres
• Seely Fire – 15,790 acres
• New Harmony Fire – 1,826 acres
• Pole Creek Fire – 1,868 acres
• Church Camp Fire – 5,750 acres
• Wolf Den Fire – 1,000 acres
• Dump Fire

From what I’ve read a whole 3 (about 30%) of the fires were caused by natural phenomena.  That makes the other 70% caused by human mistakes and/or stupidity.

Update – Thanks to the link Lisa gave in her comment, I have a more accurate count on Human vs. Nature wildfires (Note: Previous stats were on all major wildfires that made the news.  The new stats include all reported wildfires):

	Fires	%	Acres	%
Human	393	90%	99,172	91%
Lightning	45	10%	9,330	9%
Total	438		108,502

Maybe, just maybe, people will think before they set off fireworks and just not do it.  We’ll see.

Natural Utah

I couldn’t contain this theme in just one post, so here’s another entry for this week.

The sky above the Arches National Park campground at night

Looking at Canyonlands National Park from Deadhorse Point

Sailboat on the Great Salt Lake

The Jordanelle Reservoir.  We’ve got a bunch of reservoirs to give us water throughout the dry summers

Lambs Canyon, a half hour drive from the city

Bonneville Salt Flats

Skyline Arch at Arches National Park

The “Three Sisters” down in Arches National Park.

Outside of Wellington, between Price and Green River, on the way to Moab.  There are dirt roads criss-crossing all over the place here.

The West Desert, out by Iosepa, in April.

The West Desert, out by Eureka, in December.

Utah Barbies, revisited.

Back by popular demand, my second post on the very-hilarious, very local humor “Utah Barbies”

I decided to just provide a link rather than repost the whole thing.

Utah Barbies

If you read the comments on the last post, you will know that Writer asked me if I would be able to find this post I made way back in January of 2007.  I did, added the link to the comments.  The link didn’t work, so rather than fight that, I decided to just re-post it.

 

 "Park City Barbie"She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a long-haired foreign dog named Honey and a  million dollar home. Available with or without tummy tuck and face lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with the augmented version.

 

 

 

 

 "Draper Barbie"

The modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar Minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full-time occupation. Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately. 

 

 

 

 

 "Kearns  Barbie"

This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife, a Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a Meth Lab Kit. This model is only available after dark and must be paid for in cash (preferably small, untraceable bills) unless you are a cop, then we don't know what you're talking about.

 

 

 

"East Bench Barbie"
This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card and country club membership. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them.

 

 

 

 

 "Riverton Barbie"

This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR t-shirt and tweety bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Bud light and a Hank Williams Jr. CD set She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's butt when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.

 

 

 "Emigration Canyon Barbie"
This collagen injected, rhino plastic Barbie wears a leopard print outfit and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends. Percocet prescription available as well as  newly built high rise  condo. 

 

 

 

 

 "Tooele Barbie"

This tobacco-chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased beer-gutted Ken out of Butler Barbie's house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see-through halter-top. Also available with a mobile home. 

 

 

 

 " The Avenues Barbie"

This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair, arch-less feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call her Willow. She does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two  Avenues  Barbies and the optional Subaru wagon,  you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free.  

 

 

 

 "West Valley Barbie"

This Barbie now comes with a stroller and 2 infant dolls. Optional accessories include a GED and bus pass. White boy Gangsta Ken and his 1979 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant. 

 

 

 

 

 "Provo Barbie"

She's perfect in every way. We don't know where Ken is because he's always at church meetings.

 

 

 

 

 

Iosepa to near-death experience.

Ok, so one of the nice things about the wet weather is this rainbow over my garage.

I decided to get out of the house today, 3 days of going nowhere other than the Home Depot gets a little old.  So, I gassed up the BattleCruiser and headed out west.  First thought was Stansbury Island.  Been there, done that, wanted something different.  So drove past it, all the way to Delle (one gas station and closed motel).  Nothing there to see so I headed back towards SLC and when I came upon the Dugway* exit decided to see what was up that road.  The first town on the sign was Iosepa, so I decided that was where I'd go and then head on back.

There I am on the old I-80 headed out towards the Great Salt Lake.  It runs parallel to the new I-80, but is a hell of a lot more fun to drive in these big old cars.  Makes me feel like I'm in an episode of "Route 66"

The back side of the Iosepa sign.  Very, very Native American, which begs to ask......

Why "Aloha"?  Whatever, Iosepa was was even smaller than Delle.  Clump of trees, house and a barn.

The picture says it all.  that's the fire station on the right hand side.

Ok, so I did get a little dirt-roadin' in on this trip.  Went to what is called "Lone Rock", because it's, well, a lone rock out in the middle of the valley. 

Utah, famous for a whole lot of nuttin'.  This is what surrounds Lone Rock.

BattleCruiser on the hill in front of Lone Rock.  It looks a lot steeper when you're in the driver seat trying to get the thing down the hill.

Lone Rock, all alone.

And, of course, there were mud puddles left over from the recent rains, and I had to have a little bit of fun with them.  Car got a bit dirty, but it's not like it's the first time I've run a '72 Country Squire through huge mud puddles, right Gearheads?

And finally - the near death experience. 

Q - You're driving along a section of the freeway that is under construction.  You get to an exit that is closed, without any previous warning.  You:

.......... a) continue on your way to the next exit.

.......... b) ram the barriers and exit anyways, or

......... c) come to a complete stop in the middle of the freeway while you figure out what to do.

A - if you are a taxi cab in Salt Lake City, you choose "c".  Which means the car behind you has to side swipe the barriers to keep from being slammed into from the back end by a huge '72 Ford wagon, and said wagon, as the driver's (me) bladder is letting go**, swerves half way into the middle lane, praying no one is there, to avoid slamming either of the previously mentioned vehicles into next week.  Thank God, no one was there and an accident (vehicular, that is) was avoided. 

*as in the Dugway proving grounds, where they test bombs and the latest bombers.  Not as exciting as Area 51, but a laugh nonetheless.

** of course the wagon is the only LTD I have with cloth seats.  It couldn't have been the convertible, which has naugahyde seats - they're impervious to everything, even baby vomit.

Another bipolar spring in Utah.

Yesterday it was warm enough to work outside without even a jacket, today it's snowing. Typical springtime in the Rocky Mountains.

So much for Earth Hour, though. On the one hand, my house was dark and no electrical appliances were being used. On the other hand, does it count if I was over at my brother's house playing cards? I don't think so.

801 + 435 + 385 does not equal 1621.

Maybe I've just been living in Utah too long, but I don't ever remember having to dial the area code even if the number you're (Writer, does that apostrophe belong there?) calling is in the same area code. Utah just got that privilege. The 801 number is exausted. The 435 number is only used outside Salt Lake County. So, they came up with a new area code for us - 385. But instead of issuing it to a single area, like they did with the 435 prefix, they are going to just issue it to all new phone numbers. Which means even if I'm calling my next door neighbor, who has had his same number for years, I'm going to have to dial the area code.

Well, thank God for cell phones. (Yes, you heard right. As annoying as people abusing them can be, I like having one). Of course I'll have to go through my contact list and add 801 to any number that doesn't have an area code already and whenever I add a number I'll have to make sure I get the area code right. But at least once it's in the phone I won't have to remember to dial 10, instead of 7, digits. I'll still just choose "Fred" and hit the gree dial button. Uh, as long as I don't lose it again.