Friday, May 29, 2009

Big honkin' bugs...

I'm not a big fan of bugs. Especially when they get into my house, or in this case, stuck in the screen porch.
This is the first summer since I built the entry way out the back door, and it seems to be a bug trap. Big, noisy, bumble bees. You know, the ones that could feed a family of 4. They get in there, and then into the screen porch, and then can't figure out how to escape. There's already been a couple times that I had to avoid the porch and wait out the bee until it found it's way out. Another especially stupid one met the vacuum. Well, today it was me that got caught in the porch.
The porch is screened in, and has only one way out - through the entry way. I was sitting out there when mega-bee comes out of nowhere and starts bonking itself on the storm door (from entry to outside) trying to get out. I swear I thought it was going to break the glass. Not wanting a really pissed off bee to make it's way into the screen porch, I closed the screen door between the porch and the entry. Good, it can't get me. But, unless I want to share a 4' x 4' room with a maniac bee zipping around the space, I have no way out. And, I can't even open the storm door to let it out. I guess I could just sleep out there and wait until the thing gets exhausted and dies. But, being captive in my own home kicks in the claustrophobia.
So I think: Ok, I can either face the frantic stinging bug, or cut the screen and climb out. Spend an hour tomorrow fixing the screen or spend a few seconds with the bee. Guess which one I chose?
At least I have some spare screen in the garage.
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15 comments:

J said...

Well you do enjoy the porch so if you hook up some wifi out there, you are good to go AND can wait out the bee.

Have you figured out how they are getting in there to begin with? It's Gata isn't it; she's bringing you gifts. :)

Max said...

Well, I'm not sure how they are getting in, but I spent some time last night blocking the gap where the new wall meets the house. I'm hoping it was either there or the hole I left for gata to get in and out of the room. I put in an official cat door with a flap, so hopefully all that will keep them from getting in. If not, I don't know what I'm going to do.

naptime nostalgia said...

Oh man. That was awesome. Thanks for the laugh.

A Paperback Writer said...

I'll trade you the bumble bees for the spiders.
This has been the year of the spiders for me. Huge things of at least 5 different species have decided that my front porch is the ultimate hang out. I've sprayed. I've put out horrendously toxic powders. But to no avail. Every morning, I have to open the door carefully, a broom in my hand, ready to swap and stomp on whatever drops. And they're HUGE. These things -- all different types of them -- are on steroids. They're the size of quarters. gah!
Really, I think I'll take the bees. You can tell where bees are and they don't drop down on you unexpectedly.

Max said...

Naptime - that's what I'm here for, Laughs-R-Us. (you'll just have to imagine the R backwards)

Writer - phobias are cool things. See, I'd much rather have spiders out there than bees. Spiders usually run away from you, have fairly predictable paths (either on the ground or hooked to a web) and don't sting. Yeah, they bite, but they're usually too busy running like hell to get away from me. Big bees are like little dogs, they'll attack anything of any size when they're pissed. And they can fly around, hide anywhere and then dive bomb you out of nowhere.
Of course, everything you said about spiders is legitimate. Except that my phobia can beat up your phobia.

The Gearheads said...

You should keep a lampoon in your screen tent. You could have had bee shishkabobs... I hear they are real good bbqed with a little bit of honey on them.

Max said...

honey, eh? how ironic. :)

Jannx said...

I'd have to agree with Max on the spider vs bee. I don't care for either, but I would rather have to deal with a spider over a bee.

A Paperback Writer said...

Max and Jannx,
c'mon over and haul away all the arachnids you want. Anytime. Please.

Max said...

Now wait, I didn't say I thought they were cuddly cute little pets.

Jannx said...

Again, I will have to agree with Max. I don't mind (if I had to choose) spiders over bees, but when possible, I try to avoid both. However, I can try to be a spider squasher for you.

Actually, sweeper is better. I rather not kill simply for the way they look, spiders serve a useful purpose.

Anonymous said...

What is it with you and phobias? It seems to be all you have talked about lately. Not only do you teach it you live it. lol
- The foods teacher

A Paperback Writer said...

Bees serve a useful purpose, too.
But neither sort of critter serves a useful purpose hanging out on a porch. They need to be out in the garden!!

Max said...

Bees and spiders do serve their purpose and, like all bugs, deserve to live. As long as it is outside and not invading my personal space.
Foods Lady - you haven't noticed by now that I live my job? That every waking moment is spent in pursuit of my teaching, and if I can better teach phobias by living phobias I will. Sheesh!

Anonymous said...

You are a phobia!!
-Foods Teacher