Monday, April 30, 2007

Jackasses, cellphones and squeeged shorts......

Monday, monday....., First I want to thank my anonymouse friend from France for another story about Max, who if we haven't all figured out by now is my paternal grandfather. If you want to read it, it's added to the "Ducks in the road" post, just click on there.

Now to the main event. It's about 10 minutes to 7 this morning, and I'm just getting off the freeway at 7th East. (Click on the picture for a better look). The light turns green and just as I get my entire car out into the intersection, I notice this big 'ol white Chevy truck heading right at me, and he ain't slowing down. I slam on my brakes (TGFABS), the guy next to me does just the same, just as the morontosaurus notices that he's burning a red light. I'm stopped, SUV next to me is stopped, Chevy still heading straight at my door. As Holly said about exceeding light speed; "It's brown trouser time". Now this is the picture that I see in my head, it is entirely possible that my brain filled in some of the details and it's not entirely accurate, but it's my image and I'm keeping it. I see the driver dropping his cell phone from his head as he yanks the steering wheel to the left, squealing wheels around the front of my car, within inches of my bumper. I can see his face, I can see his hand halfway to the steering wheel and the phone in mid air. It's a Nokia, one of those slim ones. Black, not the pink. Yeah, a little detailed for something that happened in a split second, at a time where I was only half awake. Anyway, he makes it around my car, just to see another vehicle in his way, yanks the wheel to the left again, realizes there's no lane there for him and continues leftward onto the freeway entrance. I stuff my heart back down into my chest and proceed to school. What a way to start a Monday morning........
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Hope yours was better.

1 comment:

Pedro said...

Just when you thought that was an isolated incident, here is another moron proving he thinks he is the only one on the planet.

I was traveling south on Van Winkle approaching 1300 East. The light was green for me and red for those on 1300 East including this idiot who was traveling north. He couldn't wait for the light to turn green and he was in the right lane rather than the left lane so he did what any self respecting jackass would, he turned right and then immediately yanked a left across two lanes of Van Winkle and the median to go north on Van Winkle. I had the audacity to be traveling in front of this Ricky Bobby maneuver and almost caused him to drop his cell (I didn't see if he had one, I just had to put that in for Slim, errr, Max).

Have a great day and remember you can drive with one hand on the horn and the other, middle finger extended, out the window